Never Fit In

He turns around to face me in the grocery store and exclaims loudly. "I look a lot different from everyone else in this store I bet. More like someone European from a long time ago I guess."

He is undisguisedly gleeful about this fact.

He has no desire to fit in.

I love that he so joyfully fails to conform, all the time. I love that he's far enough removed from all the pettiness of childhood peer groups to think the whole thing is just silly. He rarely, if ever, worries about what other people think of him.

It makes me swell with pride when another kid's dad takes the time to tell me that my kid was painstakingly honest in telling him what happened, even when he is at fault. I know he can't sleep at night if he has been dishonest, not telling a lie, because he hasn't, yet, that I know, told one. No, he hangs back after a week of not sleeping well to tell me, with tears and hesitations, of things done in secret. Because butterscotch chips pilfered from the pantry when no one is looking is enough of a weight on his conscience to deprive him of sleep.

And honestly, I doubt I can really take much credit for who he is. That goes to him, and the choices he consistently makes about what he will give priority in his life. But I'm really grateful that we have been able to raise him in an environment that doesn't suffocate and dismiss his innate character. I'm glad he revels in his uniqueness. I'm glad he was baffled by the group of boys who tried to tell him he ought to wear only skinny jeans so the girls would like him. "That's just silly mom. It's like they don't have enough imagination to see that people can dress all sorts of ways and still look good."

He invariably says such things while simultaneously trying to figure out how to run up the wall and do a back flip, or some such feat of agility, until I make him stop because I don't want any more filthy footprints on the walls.

I love this kid.

And that, my friends, is one of the many reasons why we home school. To make room for our kids to find their way to the things they love, the things that really matter, (and, sorry if this offends anyone, fashion really doesn't matter), and who they choose to be. To make silly to them the idea that they ever have to change who they are to please someone else. To make sure that their uniqueness is something celebrated, not beaten down by 10 year old arbiters of taste who get all their ideas from Nick Junior and MTV.

Better Than Empty

When you go places with 4 children people notice, and they look for something to say. Some people I know are offended by the comments but I see it as a way to try and connect with what they see. Someone feels the need to observe to me, "You have your hands full!" Every time I leave the house. For about a year now I have replied by saying, "It's better than empty."

Yesterday at Costco, we were killing time in the store while our tires were replaced. The kids were playing in a demonstration play house right in the middle of the store.

He was passing by, stopping to look at the laughing children and placed his hand on my elbow, leaned in close to say, "You have your hands full."

"Better than empty," I replied with a smile.

What happened next surprised us both I think as his eyes began to water and his voice got tight. "I envy you with all my heart." he said, and then I had to look away and back at my kids with a new weight of gratitude welling up in my eyes and he moved on to make his purchases.

Just look at them. I get to be with them, all the time. I am truly blessed.

The place we hiked with dad.

rock climbing

visiting historical sites

did you know the spine of a pineapple form a perfect spiral?

My youngest BIL on his birthday

My mother's day gift that the Girl made and Aaron procured real pearls for.

What we do to house guests.

"No, I don't want to go inside."

Beach camping

My dad came to visit last week from Canada, for the first time in 3 years!

Aaron was out of town for most of it but that didn't stop us from packing as much fun into last week as we could.

What I came home to the first time I left the kids with Aaron and my dad to watch the Boy's show.

After a weekend of shows, the Boy was in a local performance of The Jungle Book, we went camping at the beach. I recommend always going camping in the middle of the week if you can. It's so much quieter. We practically had the whole place to ourselves.

The view from our campsite.

Little in a tree,

This little wood folding chair came on every camping trip I remember as a child. My dad is still bringing it on trips and now my kids are sitting in it.

My dad wears socks in his sandals.

Setting up the tent with grandpa.

racing the sunset

We got it up before sundown.

the girls built a treehouse for their stuffed animal friends.

Kitty and bobcat and Snowy the snow leopard had their own sleeping bags, made from the girls' hats.

At night the tide came in and we fell asleep listening to breakers crashing against the rocks, and that sound a rock beach makes when the water pulls back down through all the rocks. It was amazing. Too bad Bam Bam woke up yelling. He's not a fan of sleeping in strange new places apparently. It took a while to convince him that I wasn't going to take him home and he had to go back to sleep where we were. He woke everyone up in the process.

But we eventually all went back to sleep.

My dad beating the Boy in a chin up competition, and hamming it up.

Waiting for breakfast, and watching the water.

BamBam learned zippers last week, and discovered the tent's doggy door. There was no containing him.

Eating breakfast and sitting near the fire for fun, because it wasn't cold at all.

The next day we got over our tiredness and went hiking. We live in a gorgeous place, truly.

Of course I'm going to make you look at those pictures too. In another post.